quotations about beards
It's a little tragic, it's a little weird
ZZ Top are prisoners of their beards
Imagine them weightless in outerspace
Beards and shades flyin' all over the place
CHRISTINE LAVIN
"Prisoners of Their Hairdos"
You may wear, if you choose, a beard pick-a-devant,
A beard like a hammer, or jagg'd like a saw--
A beard call'd "cathedral," and shaped like a tile,
Which the widow in Hudibras served to beguile.
A beard like a dagger--nay, don't be afraid--
A beard like a bodkin, a beard like a spade;
A beard like a sugar-loaf, beard like a fork,
A beard like a Hebrew, a beard like a Turk.
Any one of these beards may be yours if you list--
According to fancy you trim it or twist.
As to colour, that matters, I ween, not a pin--
But a bushy black beard is the surest to win.
THOMAS CAMPBELL
"The Ballad of the Beard"
He was letting his hair grow, and it was only because Nature is unkind and has no regard for the immortal longings of youth that he did not attempt a beard.
W. SOMERSET MAUGHAM
Of Human Bondage
A goatee is to beards what diamonds are to ornaments.
PAWAN MISHRA
Coinman: An Untold Conspiracy
His beard is like an old mop; he shall be called Grisly-beard.
JACOB & WILHELM GRIMM
"King Grisley-Beard"
His beard grows fast as blazes, like a damp wicket in springtime sun, green, and Rachel's skin is so fine, his bristles can score her red the way a new ball marks a bat, English alum on English unbleached willow, finest quality, special selection, Rachel-grade.
EMMA RICHLER
Be My Wolff
Now I know the difference between a father's rough beard and a young man's untried bristles.
STEVEN CHOPADE
attributed, goodreads
Why do old men grow huge beards as if to proclaim a manhood that has long since fled?
JEANE WESTIN
His Last Letter
Beards are, like tusks or antlers, secondary sexual characters but, unlike these, they are not much use for intra-specific combat.
RICHARD M. WILSON
"On Beards", New Scientist, January 21, 1982
There was an old man with a beard,
Who said: "It is just as I feared--
Two Owls and a Hen,
Four Larks and a Wren
Have all built their nests in my beard.
EDWARD LEAR
Book of Nonsense
Alas, poor chin! many a wart is richer.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
Troilus and Cressida
A beard creates lice, not brains.
AMMIANUS
epigram
Jimmy wearing a beard is like Beth wearing one of her big, black, shapeless sweaters that covers her butt. But she's not wearing one of those sweaters tonight. She's wearing her Goldie Hawn dress, and Jimmy's wearing a beard. Interesting.
LISA GENOVA
Love Anthony
Unless you're in an early seventies-era Eagles cover band, a founding member of a religious cult, or sleeping under a bridge in Seattle, lose the beard and get a haircut. Power doesn't have time for any form of hirsute hipster self expression.
ARI GOLD
The Gold Standard: Rules to Rule By
If you think that to grow a beard is to acquire wisdom, a goat is at once a complete Plato.
LUCIAN
Greek Anthology
There is something about a man with a beard I cannot stand. No particular reason for it. Prejudice, I suppose. I feel the same way about cats.
CHARLES WILLEFORD
Pick-Up
Moustache, no
Sideburns, no
Goatee, maybe
Beard, beard
PSYCHOSTICK
"Obey the Beard"
His beard is like the thistle of the pastures, when the northwind whistleth on the hills. Ewen hath mowed it with his cutlass, as the wildgoat goat croppeth the flower.
JAMES MACPHERSON
The Fingal of Ossian
My beard wants to know if you would like a comfortable place to sit down?
VICTORIA DENAULT
Slammed
Small show of man was yet upon his chin;
His phoenix down began but to appear.
WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE
A Lover's Complaint