LAWYER QUOTES IV

quotations about lawyers

lawyers quote

I realized the true function of a lawyer was to unite parties riven asunder. The lesson was so indelibly burnt into me that a large part of my time during the twenty years of my practice as a lawyer was occupied in bringing about private compromises of hundreds of cases. I lost nothing thereby -- not even money, certainly not my soul.

MAHATMA GANDHI

An Autobiography

Tags: Mahatma Gandhi


Lawyers are like painters--once they get into a house, you never know when you will get rid of them again.

PETER ANDERSON GRAHAM

The Red Scaur


Some lawyers are like unto the camel, which, before drinking out of a brook, maketh the water turbid with his foot.

ADOLPHUS WILLIAM WARD

"Abraham a Sancta Clara", Collected Papers


Lawyers are the jackals of commerce.

ELBERT HUBBARD

Fra Magazine, Sep. 1911

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Jury--Twelve persons chosen to decide who has the better lawyer.

LENORA OLIVER

Herald, 1938


Why don't you ever hear of a lawyer getting attacked by a shark at the beach? Professional courtesy.

THOMAS F. SHUBNELL

Greatest Jokes of the Century


Lawyers are like unrequited lovers--you give them an inch, and they go for the whole nine yards; you take off one shoe, and they pull down your pants.

ANDRES RUEDA

The Clawback


A countryman between 2 Lawyers, is like a fish between two cats.

BENJAMIN FRANKLIN

Poor Richard's Almanack, 1737

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If you cannot avoid a quarrel with a blackguard, let your lawyer manage it, rather than yourself. No man sweeps his own chimney, but employs a chimney-sweeper, who has no objection to dirty work, because it is his trade.

CHARLES CALEB COLTON

Lacon

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Lawyers generally know too much of law to have a very clear perception of justice.

ELIZA COOK

Diamond Dust

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There must be some honest lawyers at the New York bar, and some impartial judges on the New York bench, but I should not like to be set to find them.

LYMAN ABBOTT

Laicus: Or, The Experiences of a Layman in a Country Parish

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The Post Office just recalled their newest stamps: They had a picture of lawyers on them ... and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

MARVIN LEBMAN

A Collection of Jokes and Funny Stories


A lawyers performance in the courtroom is responsible for about 25 percent of the outcome; the remaining 75 percent depends on the facts.

MELVIN BELLI

attributed, Jar of Quotes

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Lawyers are like that famous vampire-bat, said to exist in Hungary, which seizes on a creature, and never lets go while there is blood left.

WALTER BESANT

Dorothy Forster


I cannot believe that a republic could subsist if the influence of the lawyers in public business did not increase in proportion to the power of the people.

ALEXIS DE TOCQUEVILLE

Democracy in America


Lawyers are fleas on the hide of human nature.

STEPHEN KING

"1922", Full Dark, No Stars

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How many lawyers does it take to change a light bulb? How many can you afford?

BLANCHE KNOTT

Blanch Knott's Treasury of Tastelessness


It is an ill cause that the lawyer thinks shame o'.

JOHN RAY

A Complete Collection of English Proverbs


Lawyers are like rabbits. They have a nasty habit of multiplying.

LEO REILLY

How to Outnegotiate Anyone


Lawyers enjoy a little mystery, you know. Why, if everybody came forward and told the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth straight out, we should all retire to the workhouse.

DOROTHY L. SAYERS

Clouds of Witness

Tags: Dorothy L. Sayers